User Profile

Come on in my dear friends, and welcome!!!


The following are posted in this order, on this page:
1. My Salvation Testimony
2. My Personal Profile
3. My List of Doctrinal Beliefs

(And, if you're still up to reading more, don't forget to eventually click on my username above to glimpse and e-respond to my journal) =)


Following, is the short version of my salvation testimony. But let me qualify by saying that it was only the beginning of my spiritual journey at age ten. The Christian walk is not a piece of cake, and so we must embrace our salvation in Christ day by day if we are not to shame His worthy Name. God never promises that the ongoing process of being made holy in salvation will be easy, yet, according to the measure of our grace-sustained faith through the trials, tribulations, temptations, heartaches and persecutions of life, we will surely find our reward in Him forever.

I was raised in a Christian home by Christian parents. I was taught the Bible from an early age, and every night before bed I prayed the prayer for God to give me a "new heart." Oddly enough, even though my parents always told me that just because I was raised in a Christian home with Christian parents and went to church three times a week, it didn't mean that I was a true Christian--yet I still blindly put myself in that category. I was a blind, proud, selfish, egotistical child who thought I was better than those around me. What I didn't realize was that my pride was actually the biggest thing between me and God.

Finally God shoved the truth into my face. I watched a movie one night with my family, and in this movie a young woman was faced with a decision either to serve Satan and die in her spirit forever, or else to refuse Satan, accept Jesus, and have her head immediately cut off. She trembled with indecision, and those who served Satan led her to the gulliotine. Finally they tied her down, but an earthquake began to shake the ground. Her executioners ran away in fear--even as she yelled to them that she would serve Satan. But it was too late. They were gone, the earthquake triggered the heavy blade, and it sliced down upon her neck and ended her life forever.

This shook me as I realized that my dedication to Christ was not firm enough to equip me with strength to die for Him--or to die, regardless. I was not so sure of my salvation that I knew I could firmly say, in time of testing, "Yes, I am ready to die for You. Take me, Lord Jesus." He was not THAT real to me--but more like a distant acquaintance. To die without forgiveness through God, however, was an unpleasant thought. What of my eternity? Was I now truly willing to surrender my whole heart and my whole life to Him, leaving nothing back? Was I willing to accept my need for forgiveness for sins of selfishness and pride? Was I willing to accept that my Creator died for ME, to take my "punishment" that I might live? Was I willing even now to die for Him, if He asked it of me?

These questions flashed through my mind so quickly. There was no long period of mind-twisting agony, no heavy tears--just a quiet searching of mind as I lay upon my bed after watching the movie. Suddenly the answer became so clear--for I felt the strong presence of God and His Truth surround me, and the simple words of salvation which He enabled me to utter were, "Yes, Jesus, I will even die for You if You ask it of me."

That was my first true surrender to God. And it changed my life forever, for God then revealed Himself to me in an even deeper and more personal way. There was no way I could doubt the truth of His existence, nor the truth of His Love for me. It was as clear cut as my own existence. I was thus set free from myself in a way that revealed my previous bondaage(enslavement to myself)--which I did not even previously know existed.

I have had to surrender to God many times since then, to acknowledge and repent of my sins, in order to have clear sight of the "loving bridge which has been laid across the huge gulf" between God and myself. Sin has the power to blind me into doubt, despair, and unbelief, and if I cannot see God, the fault is my own lack of humility. It is my desire to have my own way, no matter what the cost.

Yet God is faithful to me, as He promised. He will continue to give me strength to endure. And for this I will owe Him for eternity. I can never do enough to repay Him. He is my Lord.


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2. Personal Profile

I always hesitate when it comes to sharing my personal profile with other people. I sometimes write one up, but then I lock it away for no one's eyes but by own to read. It just "feels" so egotistical to list so many "I," "I," "I"s....for others to read. I don't want my motive misunderstood. But believe me, it makes it so much easier to relate to someone (even in their Live Journal entries) when you know certain things about them--their personality, temperament, background, exposures, and basic ideas. So I've finally got up the guts to post the following information about myself. And hey, I would even encourage you to reveal the same about yourself for my own benefit! YEAH! I would love to get a glimpse into who you are. =)


1. I'm the oldest of eight children to my parents: I have three brothers (one of which is deceased) and four sisters. For those who aren't familiar with my family, the following list is composed so that my journal entries will be more understandable:

My Dad : has a heart which beats with solid conviction, and he does well at expressing it.

My Mom : loves her children and prays for them every day.

Melody : talkative, rambuncious, bossy, beautiful 23 yr. old sister

Tommy : 21 yr. old computer whiz, web-page designing brother who lives back where I was a few months ago--in Texas.

Timothy: (would be 19 yrs. old, but died at 13 months of spinal meningitus)

Charity : 17 yr. old sister who is already teaching piano after taking lessons for only a few months.

Samuel : 14 yr. old brother who offered to keep the entire house clean for five dollars a week because he enjoys work and loves to earn money.

Harmony : strong-willed 12 yr. old sister who wants to be a vet when she is older, and who generously gave me a precious break from my private-duty aide job awhile back.

Autumn : patient 9 yr. old sister who would break her back to help anybody, just to keep the peace. "We all love you, Autie!"


2. I helped to raise all of my siblings. Boy, what a blast!

3. I was homeschooled into my teens; then for several years I edited and wrote for my own publication, after which time I took my GED and went on to "other things"--namely, caring for the elderly.

4. I'm not really a "career woman." I prefer close-knit family life and domestic duties.

5. My definition of success is "to put my whole heart into whatever my hands find to do, and to do it for the right reason and with the right motive." It is my firm belief that level of education, financial wealth, status, job title or occupation have little to do with true success.

6. I love to clean and cook and decorate, etc., but I would rather do these things than to talk, write, or read about them.

7. I'm a hopeless romantic: I can find romance in everything, nature, life, relationships with people, poetry, candles, stars, outings and events, cardboard boxes, automobiles, you name it.

8. Facts and figures in the concrete world fascinate me, but I'm hopeless at remembering them unless I write them down for repeated study.

9. I think mostly in the abstract, meaning that I often judge even the concrete in the abstract unless I make concious effort not to. For instance I may see a picture of a galloping horse on the wall and think thoughts about freedom and flying and joy--but two days later you ask me about the picture on the wall, and I ask, "What picture?" Then you ask me about freedom and joy, and I can immediately rattle on for ten minutes.

10. The technical world does not fascinate me as much as does the mechanical--nevertheless, I love to hear information about either one, as long as I can ask gobs of questions--and maybe take notes if I wish to remember what I heard.

11. In spite of the fact that I'm twenty-five years old, everything and everyone still fascinates me.

12. I am an INTJ (Introverted, Intuitive, Thinking, Judging)

13. The opportunity to travel "in the flesh" would thrill me beyond belief, but if not given such opportunity, I can always take a trip around the world in my mind.

14. I am very easily entertained.

15. All types of music appeal to me, even the most despicable and generally annoying. Therefore it is a conscious decision I've made not to listen to anything that will hinder me spiritually.

16. My tastes in food are endless. I'm just as likely to eat stale cheetos out of a bag as I am to eat sushi. I don't think I've been to a restaurant I haven't enjoyed--no matter the menu. Also, my dad loves junk food, and my mom loves health food. So I do well with both.

17. I try to eat as concienciously as possible (and within reason) to preserve my health for the future--Of course this means I don't necessarily have to eat expensive foods from a health food store.

18. I am raised in a family where my mother is more disciplined in schedule, and my father less so. My father is a night owl, and my mother is a morning person. Therefore I've learned to be both rigid and flexible (flexible I'm still working on, cause I mentally cope better on a schedule), and I've learned to sleep with the lights on or the lights off, the music on or the music off, sitting up, laying on the bed (or on the floor when we didn't have beds.) Maybe you get the picture. =)

19. I generally prefer for things to be kept clean and orderly, but I'm flexible here when it comes to other people--simply because I so happen to enjoy putting things back into their places. Occasionally, during a period of involved inspiration, I myself will leave things lying about until my inspiration has run its course.

20. I enjoy all manner of activities as long as I'm not put in a position of *heavy* competition against a crowd. (I shy from aggression/harsh judgment of performance.) I also shy from positions of public immodesty or unmodest dress in activity, or positions of unwise risk for my life.

It's not that I can't be daring if faith asks for it, and it's not that I fear death. This is more of a logical decision regarding respect for the life God gave me and for those who care about me. Trust me, I would absolutely LOVE to jump off a cliff with a parachute, but I probably never will unless someone else's life is in danger down below. Then I would have Biblical sanction. YEA!

21. I am non-aggressive in general and do not enjoy dominating or intimidating others in relationships (I suffer great emotional regret afterwards if I do--even if it's only within my own family); but I do have beliefs, convictions, and opinions which I am willing to share. I am not ususally comfortable to take the lead in a situation where someone else more qualified is present, especially not where men are involved, but I do have leadership desire and capabilities--especially with children.

22. I don't *always* enjoy work just for work's sake (depends upon the work), but I enjoy work more specifically as it relates to and presses toward the final goal which I have in mind. I generally come up with a "higher purpose" for everything that I do.

23. After my work is completed for the day I do love to "stop and smell the roses"--They always smell better after a job's well done.

24. I am much more sociable in one-on-one settings with people than in large groups--although I enjoy large groups when accompanied by someone who cares about me and will actively include me. (This is partly due to my non-aggressive nature and my analytical mind which struggles to multi-task in crowds or to "process large amounts of information all at once." It also arises from my impossible striving to remain sensitive to so many differerent types of people all at once.)

25. I like to learn everything I can about a subject before writing or speaking about it. I like to be sure of my facts (especially since I'm so bad at remembering them), and sometimes this keeps me from sharing as much as I would otherwise.

26. I love listening to other people talk. I can listen for hours.

27. I love physical activities, especially the vigorous, outdoor ones. Keeping in shape is always either at the forefront or at the back of my mind.

28. I play both the piano and the guitar a little. Basic hymns mostly. My hectic and uncertain schedule throughout past years has prevented me from excelling at either instrument. Maybe someday....

29. I love to view art, study history, and write poetry.

30. I'm not much of a prankster, though I'm often willing to join in the "fun" if I know it'll be taken in good humor. Otherwise I shy from it.

31. Most people (who know me well) believe that I tend to think "outside the box."

32. I do need to take a little time to "veg out." Vegging out, for me, means either to sit back and analyze, to listen to, watch, or read something to analyze, to discuss what I have analyzed with someone else, or to just have a good time with close family through activity or discussion.

33. I see tons of humor in everyday life.

34. Satire and sarcasm fascinate me.

35. When I let loose and be who I really am with my family, they start to laugh. Even when I'm upset they sometimes laugh.

36. Illogical people and over-reactors upset me more quickly than anything else--well, only on rare occasion do I actually illogically "over-react" to them. =)

37. I don't tend to have strong likes/dislikes when it comes to people. To me, everyone is gifted, intelligent, and interesting in his/her own way.

38. The thing that bothers me most is when I'm completely absorbed in something, and then someone comes in and physically disturbs me without asking first.

39. I'm generally an idealist and a perfectionist in regard to myself (though I generally expect much less from others). I've found that in order to live life more fully, I have to content myself with "less than perfect" while striving all the while, after godly manner, to reach my goals.




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3. List of Doctrinal Beliefs

I DO believe the following statements:

(The following statements are not all listed in order of importance, nor are they exhaustive. Also, I have not listed scripture references, [though I have them] because my goal is not here to pursuade--but merely to enlighten the curious as to the positions I take on things. The primary pupose of my LJ is to uplift and to encourage others, not to debate--although there is always place for sincere discussion. Nevertheless, for those of you who are curious, read on. =) )

1. The Bible is the infallible and inspired Word of God.

2. Jesus is God incarnate

3. God is three-in-one: The Trinity

4. All suffering is permitted by God for a reason.

5. Believers' baptism by immersion is scriptural.

6. Women should, out of genuine love and respect for male sexual purity, cover their bodies in public with long, modest, non-form-fitted clothing.

7. Women should wear a headcovering.

8. Married women with children should be stay-at-home mothers.

9. The Holy Spirit of God must open a sinner's spiritual eyes before that sinner can understand his own dire, lost condition.

10. In a genuine act of salvation The Holy Spirit of God must help a sinner choose to believe in Him because depraved sinners cannot desire good things for truly spiritual reasons.

11. True worship is faith resulting in obedience.

12. The Old and New Testaments do not morally contradict; rather they merge to reveal greater and more fulness of truth than can be understood through study of one Testament alone.

13. It is not wrong to obey certain commands in the Old Testament or to observe a Jewish feast, but this is not required of Gentiles. And it certainly is not required for eternal salvation.

14. If a Christian finds himself financially poor, He should search his heart for the message God is giving Him through the experience--whether it be that he has sin in his life, or whether it merely be that God wishes to teach him patience, empathy, endurance, faith, wisdom to find his way out of the dire situation, or something else.

15. God wants the physical best (in the here and now) for every one of His children, but sometimes He ordains it otherwise for their spiritual and eternal benefit.

16. SOMETIMES the reason why God's children do not prosper financially is because they have not surrendered the idol of wealth or financial security to Him in their hearts (or because He knows it would be a constant temptation/ destructive force to them if they possessed it). If their motives for attaining wealth would definitely change from being selfish to being spiritually generous, and if those motives were then accompanied by faith, then God would be more likely to answer their prayers for wealth with a "yes."

17. Subtle messages within The Arts and modern entertainment can tear a person down spiritually if he is unguarded and not actively exercising his faith.

18. The gift of "tongues" are real languages, discernable as such by linguists.

19. There are false prophets, false tongue-speakers, and false miracle workers. Those genuine will line up with God's Word (the true Test and Standard), no "spirit-filled" word they utter will be proven false, and they will undeniably demonstrate true repentance and the FRUITS of the Spirit.

20. Eschatological position: Pre-mil, Post-trib

21. My position regarding Sabbath day observance; Because so many are curious, I will go into more detail as to what I believe here and why I believe it:

The Sabbath day (seventh day) was first instituted at creation to commemorate God's acts of creation. As such it was kept holy (sanctified) by God before the time of Mt. Sinai. The holy ground (or period of time) upon which God stands (or rests) is not merely to be regarded as holy by God, but by men as well. For instance, God required Moses to remove the sandals from his feet because the ground upon which he stood was holy. (God's presence and desire made it such.)

The seventh day was specifically created as The Sabbath Day in the beginning, was made holy by God for the benefit of man before sin entered the world, and I do not believe it is ceremonial law to be "done away with" (though practical applications of sabbath observance were kept alongside ceremonial laws. And other "sabbaths" were instituted, only to become non-requirements after Christ's coming).

But the seventh-day Sabbath was carved as a foundational moral law within the Ten Commandments, by the finger of God and reflective of His holy heart, into tablets of stone. It is my belief that I am still to keep the seventh day holy, even as Jesus widely and very clearly demonstrated (through His own life and teachings) that I now should keep the seventh-day Sabbath holy in this Spirit-blessed time--by resting and acting in a benevolent manner on this day (for are we not shown love through His redemptive work?)

Thus we are to keep the Sabbath Day holy, both in Spirit and in truth and in accordance with the mighty acts of the Son of God (or The Word of God, both our creator and redeemer [John 1].)


My list of "I Do Not Believes":


1. I do not believe that baptism is necessary to complete the spiritual process of regeneration.

2. I do not believe that people may be eternally saved without receiving Jesus into their hearts.

3. I do not believe that the King James Translation is utterly infallible and the only translation to be used.

4. I do not believe that a Christian has necessarily reached a higher level in his spiritual walk when God gives him/her the gift of speaking in tongues. After all, the Word of God specifically states that different believers are gifted differently.

5. I do not believe that all truly saved Christians will speak in tongues.

6. I do not believe that a huge portion of the commands in scripture may be interpreted away with the "cultural argument."

7. I do not believe that women should be permitted to teach in the midst of public church services, to shame a man in his knowledge, or to usurp authority over and teach him.

8. I do not believe in divorce and re-marriage.

9. I do not believe that the Jewish ceremonial laws and feasts must now be observed by Gentiles.

10. I do not believe that according to scripture, children are generally optional in a marriage, and that this option is, in God's eyes, up to the couple's preference.


I also do NOT believe the following statements:

1. "God cannot have a pre-ordained purpose for evil because to permit evil would make Him evil (and to permit evil without a purpose would make Him senseless and cruel). Therefore evil must exist apart from His previous knowledge of its coming into existence."

2. "A literal, scorching hell does not eternally exist for unrepentant sinners."

3. "The Old Testament doesn't have a lot to say to us today because the Old and New testaments conflict in their basic applications of moral principles and cannot be reconciled."

4. "It is not likely to hinder the testimony of Christ if preachers and missionaries use a significant portion of the money donated into their ministries to live extravagant lives."

5. "It is better to "worship" God with emotion-stirring music than without it, BECAUSE not only does it make the worship experience seem more genuine; it actually makes the worship more genuine." (On the contrary, I actually believe, as written in my list above, that true worship is faith resulting in obedience--although good music can demonstrate to us the nature of God in much the same way that His beautiful creation can demonstrate it. But "emotion stirring," in itself is not true worship, though it may accompany such worship.)

Friends (39):

Friend of (45):